Day 160 - Second Semester - First Year

A few things have changed since I last made an entry. 

From a creature-pleasure standpoint, I started making kombucha, put my sofa in front of the window and shortened my desk (to free up space). I also moved my bed to the wall adjacent to the living room so that I don't have to hear my neighbor anymore. 

And now minimalism:

I'm still attempting to get rid of more unnecessary belonging, although I must say it is becoming difficult to find the energy to go through them. Some of these things include:

1. A transparent box full of coins (what the hell am I supposed to do with pennies?)
2. An electric guitar that was loaned to me (which is difficult to give back because of the pandemic situation)
3. An iron (which I keep because I still live in the illusion that one day I'll dress nice)
4. Two barstools that I purchased without thinking about leg room (my counter doesn't go out much)
5. A computer chair that I took from my parents by impulse (more on this later) 
6. A wide variety of hoodies, pullovers and sweatshirts (seriously how many does one need?

That's all I can think of for now, but there is more. 

Another thing that has been on my mind recently is the amount of work/effort I'm supposed to put in on a daily basis. If I'm being honest, I'm only capable of working for about 3.5 hour without distraction. That means that every morning I have to decide what I will prioritize doing during the day because the rest of my readings/homework will be half-assed. I'm starting to think that I'm probably not supposed to read everything that's assigned in great detail. Perhaps skimming the less important papers would suffice. The problem is, which papers are the less important ones? I'm concerned that if I skim too much, I will have a hard time writing my comprehensive exam. Last semester I seriously read the articles for my concentration courses and my statistics class and COMPLETELY neglected the readings in research methodology and experimental methods. Interestingly enough, I got good grade in both of the courses that I neglected, but I'm still waiting on grades for the courses I didn't. Going back to time allocation, I typically start my day around 8:30 - 9:00 and I do most of my productive work until 12:00. The rest of the day is half-assed and around 15:00 to 16:00 I'm so drained that I can't keep going. I tried working later a few times and the next day was completely wasted (dry eyes, bad mood, terrible headache). It's definitely not a diet issue - I've tried a variety of things for lunch (from skipping it altogether to very heavy meaty meals). I'm inclined to think it is a motivational problem (or perhaps a lack of leisure?).

Another thing related to the previous point about productivity is my growing concern for my health. I feel heavy, drained and unmotivated to workout at home. The equipment I recently acquired quickly became dull. My sister suggested that I do something more interactive like dancing. I've tried it, enjoyed it for about 20 minutes and got bored. A while ago my mom suggested I buy cross country ski and make it my sport. I just don't see how it could possibly work considering I get up from my desk at 16:00 with only an hour of sunlight left. 
With some introspection, I found out that I'm not so preoccupied about my health as I am with aesthetics. Being healthy is great, but what I'm most concerned with is getting fat. Perhaps the answer isn't so much in physical activity as it is in nutrition. I don't eat junk food (including anything with added sugar) regularly and I have no sweets in my apartment. I don't know what else I could possibly do at this point. I tried intermittent fasting, it was too much of a hassle. I don't particularly feel like trying diets because that's a slippery slope considering my rather unhealthy relationship with food. One thing that I am considering is changing up with proportion of animal to plant protein. Perhaps I can give my body a break from digesting animals from time to time? 
Another thing I read was that our bodies need to be constantly in motion. The only way to accommodate that for me is to ditch the computer chair (and ball) and sit on the floor. That will allow me to move my legs all the time (going from squat to extended legs to lotus, etc.) and possibly even improve my flexibility. I guess I'll give it a try, although the coffee table I have is a bit too tall for that. 

All of this might sound like a lot of complaining, but it's really a build up to what I'm about to write down - a list of goals. I heard in a dumb motivational YouTube video that you're supposed to write down your goals for accountability (and then to stop bitching about the problems are actually reach those goals). To that I'm also going to add that goals should have a concrete procedure on how to attain them. These goals should probably be reasonable (yeah no more writing "get a six pack") and attainable. So here they are:

• Increase truly productive time from 3.5 hours to 4 hours.
• Don't open signal on my computer and leave phone in different room
• Don't let myself watch any content until the 4h are done
• Time the breaks (not the hours worked, I tried that it makes it harder to concentrate)
• Don't connect second monitor unless necessary
• Improve flexibility and leg strength (and posture?)
• Sit on the floor as long as possible
• Possibly purchase a yoga block
• Go for a walk after lunch and dinner
• Improve aesthetics (mostly upper body)
• Workout 3 times a week (scheduled)
• Workout at 70% of 1MR x 4 sets (purple band)
• Weigh myself in the morning on workout days (write down)
• Alter nutrition
• Make the remaining meat in the fridge optional or 1/4 of plate
• Once no more meat in the fridge - only buy prime cuts and occasionally 
• Stop eating so much Mayo (in the morning, that can't be good for me)

Those are the 4 goals I'm going to work on for the upcoming weeks. I'm going to give myself the rest of February to see if I make any progress.